Tuesday, September 22, 2009

It's beginning to look a lot like Halloween.

Yesterday I was able to check item number 1,756 off my very large list of things to get done at some point within the next few weeks.

The dreaded Purchasing of the Halloween Costumes 2009 has been completed.

It's not that I dread Halloween. I'll admit that I didn't always dig it in the past. I'm more of a Christmas gal myself, but since having children, I look forward to Halloween slightly more than I used to. Which still isn't that much. Basically I love it the day of Halloween and maybe a few days before, but that's about it. After all, I'm one of those oh-so-annoying people that starts listening to Burl Ives croon "Holly Jolly Christmas" towards the end of October. And Burl Ives kind of conflicts with jack-o-lanterns.

My kids love Halloween, so I love it for them. They've been talking about their costumes and what they want to be since early August. George has decided to be a pirate, which is cool because we already have a pirate costume. Actually, I convinced him that a pirate would be fun, but he thinks it's his decision. I rock at mind games with small children. I've also decided that Annabel is going to be a ladybug.

Don't you love the days when you can still control your kids' little minds and tell them what they are going to be for Halloween, a la George and Annabel?

Charlie and Henry, not so much. Damn that independent thinking.

I've been throwing out costume ideas to them.

"How about you guys go as Super Mario Brothers? You can be Luigi and your brother can be Mario! I'll glue little mustaches on you, and you can wear hats, white gloves and overalls." I said, thinking it was quite brillz.

"Um, mom, NO. WAY. Only babies are Super Mario Brothers." Charlie informed me.

"Really? Because last time I checked, babies don't play video games. And babies don't even know who the Super Mario Brothers are, so they can't be them for Halloween can they?"

Whatevs, mom. You're so lame, yo.

"Hey! I once saw someone go as a garbage can for Halloween! How about you go as a recycling bin, and wear all green, then I'll glue empty water bottles and cardboard boxes to you, and make you a cool hat!"

"Mom, I am NOT going as garbage for Halloween. Everyone will make fun of me."

Yo. Even lamer.

"What about a slice of pizza? That sounds like an easy enough costume for me to make. I'll make a cool crust up by your neck and stuff it with fabric to make it puffy, then I'll glue little mushrooms and pepperonis on you."

"No way. I want to be a 'Star Wars' character again," was the general consensus between the two of them.

To which I thought, "Yo. That's the lamest of them all."

What is it with those light-saber-carrying dudes that has boys in a tizzy? Last year, Charlie begged me to let him be Anakin Skywalker, so I reluctantly went to Target and plunked down $29.99 for what was really just one long piece of poo-brown fabric that slipped over his clothes and tied at the back of his neck. It looked like one long, continuous, giant turd. There were some fake painted-on buttons on the front that must mean something to other Jedis, but I don't speak Jedi, so it just looked cheap and boring to me. But he loved it, and he was happy, so I was happy.

I pick my battles.

Henry was Darth Vader last year, which was great for him, since he got to hide behind the fierce-looking Darth mask and pretend he was the powerful, hated, and fallen, former Jedi. To rock the Darth costume is every boy's dream at some point, especially if he has confidence issues like my Henry.

Well hold on to your trick-or-treat bags, because this year, they are going to be the oh-so-original-nobody-else-in-the-whole-world-will-ever-think-of-it: Star Wars Clone Troopers.

Yawn.

I've learned that boys are not the hugest risk takers when it comes to fashion statements or Halloween costumes. They just want to look like all their friends. And I have been informed that even though their costumes look mostly identical, Henry is actually Commander Rex and Charlie is Commander Cody. So yeah. They're totally different. Even though they're mostly the same. God forbid they stand out from their friends.

Growing up, most of my Halloween costumes were not store bought. My parents had six girls, so they definitely would not go out and buy all six of us new costumes every year. We had to get creative. I was a punk-rocker one year with sprayed-on pink hair, and another year I made my own 1950's costume.

I even had the bright idea that my kids could all go as "Wizard of Oz" this year. With three boys and one girl, isn't it just perfect?

Yeah, tell that to my guys. They've decided that that idea is Lame City. And I'm the mayor. Yo.

At least it's done. The costumes are bought, and it's still only September. That's one less thing for me to think about, right? No scrambling at the last minute. So I'm happy about that. Unless they change their minds. Which they might. There's still plenty of time for waffling.

Yet another reason why I think Christmas trumps Halloween.

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