My kids and this whole wanting-to-get-a-pet thing?
They're working it. Big time.
As I have said many times, we will get a dog.
I promise. They can hold me to it.
But after having four kids in 6 years, and now doing this parenting thing for the last decade, I just need to catch my breath. I am not ready to clean up dog poop. I have seen enough of the human kind over the last ten years. I'm good.
First, we had a betta fish. It died. We got another betta fish. It died. We got another betta fish. Guess what happened to that one?
Flush. Off to the big drain in the sky.
Then we got sea monkeys.
Last year, one of my sons requested a pet scorpion.
Nope. Never. Gonna. Happen.
Today I found this in my 8-year old son's backpack. It touched my sarcastic, temporarily anti-pet little heart.
Clearly, he wants a guinea pig. And don't you think for one second that he wants a hamster.
Because hamsters are nocturnal, and you won't see the action, yo.
So all you hamster owners? Fools. You are missing out on the action. What action? Well, the action...like...well...spinning around in a ball...and...um...eating carrots...and yeah. ACTION. Guinea pigs are where it's at.
Of course, my boy got the idea that he wanted a guinea pig from his best friend, who has a guinea pig named Checkers. I had the pleasure of meeting Checkers recently, and yes, I'm not gonna lie. He is quite adorable. He even purrs when you pet him.
Betcha those boring nocturnal hamsters don't purr.
Hamsters are chumps.
Checkers is cute and furry, and has a sweet little face. Coincidentally, that's exactly how I like the animals with whom I come in contact. Cute and furry. Slimy? No. Hairless? No. With a long, slithering tongue? Hell no.
My friend Rhonda, also the mother of my son's best friend, and subsequently the mother of Checkers the Guinea Pig, has me almost convinced that a guinea pig would be a good pet.
I said almost convinced.
This second son of mine has a birthday in February, so I still have plenty of time to think about it.
I'm getting there. Slowly.
But for now, the only pets allowed in this house are the Zhu-Zhu kind.
Baby steps, people. Baby steps.