Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Yes, YOU can be a Diva too!

My fourth child, my little girl, has a birthday coming up next Friday.

She will be four years old, and because she is my only girl, it is usually quite easy to shop for her presents. After all, in this house with three boys and all their fun, but rough and tumble boy accoutrement, a little pink and frilly and girlie is lacking and always a welcome sight. My girl and I are outnumbered 4 to 2 in this house, so we do what we can to inject a little estrogen into the mix.

Today, as I was shopping for her birthday presents, I reached the aisle with the dress-up clothing, and I stopped dead in my tracks when I happened upon this display.

The sign at the top of the display asks, "What will you be?"

As in, when you grow up, kids. When you finally break free from Mom and Dad, and burst forth into the world ready to make your mark on it.

Your choices are a builder, a chef or a diva.

A builder and a chef? Both awesome career choices. But a diva?

Yes, a diva. As a career.

I was, as the British say, gobsmacked. Of course I know these are toys. Of course I have a sense of humor and perspective. I get it. I'm an adult; therefore, I realize that it's not an actual career. It's all in good fun, right?

But why, if it's all in good fun, does it have to say, "What will you be?" as if it's a legitimate career choice?

As I stood there, my mouth was agape as I perused the display. I couldn't help but chuckle at the complete ridiculousness of it all. I was stunned that in 2011, this is what toy designers come up with for our children. Yes, I realize that impressionable little girls have been dressing up as princesses for decades, and that is about as unrealistic a career choice as any, but most girls, even little ones, know that is a fantasy. Unless you are the beautiful Kate Middleton, of course.

Why a diva? And how, exactly, does one become a diva? Are there college courses available for such a career path?

I can only imagine the course load.

Gum-smacking, Sass-talking, Seething and Slapping As An Art Form

Naming Your Diva Self: Just Add -ooki or -woww 

Reality Shows Are Right For You!

Protecting Your Hair Follicles From Your Bump-It

All Publicity is Good Publicity - Even the Bad Kind

Five Inch Stilettos and Your Health: Avoiding Bunions and Hammer Toes

Tube Dressing 101: Work It Girl. Rock It Out.

My Boyfriend Won't Wear Ed Hardy - Can This Relationship Be Saved?

Haters Are Just Jealous of You: How To Not Let It Ruin Your High Self-Esteem

In Da Club: That's Where You Can Find Me. That's Right.

It's Getting Hot in Hurrrrre, Imma Check My Tempaturrrrre: A How-To

How to Ruin Friends and Win Enemies

Anatomy of a Temper Tantrum

How To Throw Your Drink In Someone's Face: It's All In the Wrist

Study up, girls of tomorrow! And you too can achieve greatness! Diva greatness!

Also? In case you were wondering, Diva greatness comes with feathers. Lots of feathers. And purple heels. And sparkles.

The biggest problem that I have with this display is not the tackiness, but that it lacks equal opportunity for the sexes. Sure, we girls can work hard all our lives, hoping and striving to one day achieve full Diva greatness, but what about boys? Where is their equal career choice?

Toy Makers of 2011, listen up. Boys need something for which to strive.

Rhymes with koosh bag.

Get on that.


  1. I'd personally like to see an emo section for kids. Complete with black eyeliner, wigs with bette paige bangs, black nail polish and a host of bright eyes records...

    It could be unisex!

  2. Wow. And I do mean WOW. Seriously. There are so many thoughts flying through my head right now...I can't form any of them into complete sentences! :)
    I see there is no "SAHM" category for career choice...but "Diva"--now there's what to strive for, kids. Marry rich! Aim high!?! Be completely absorbed...in yourself. Ahhhh...progress. (I'll second your sigh.)

  3. So maybe at this moment, for the first time, I'm grateful I don't have a girl because the crazy,trashy clothes, toys, and images thrust upon them at such a young age is kinda appalling. I know you are a good parent so you'll filter it all, but it's rather disturbing. That said, the potential classes were hilar!

  4. OK...for the boys? I'm thinking a professional slacker career option. Costume choices include low-riding, boxer exposing pants, white "undershirt" (no, I will not use that W-Beater term), and a video/TV remote as an accessory.

    ps - Would you ever consider a guest post on another site? As in...mine? No pressure, but I'd love to have you if you'd be interested.

  5. I'm sure the Khardashians resent this blog post! LOL!!!

  6. Nicolette - Emo? What an awesome career choice for any kid! :)

    Muffintopmommy - Yes! It is the one thing about having a daughter that still baffles me - just how much trashy crap is out there! There definitely is not the same thing for boys.

    Sue - For reals? A guest spot on one of my fave blogs, Desperate Housemommy? I would love it! So flattered! I will contact you!

    Denny - Yes, I'm sure the Kardashians are totally seething in their stilettos as we speak! Because they read my little ol' blog, right? ;)


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